She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
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