do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
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