I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
Randomize
