I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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