On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Randomize