batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
Fuck me I smell like cheese
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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