he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
So squirting runs in the family.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
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