You smell like stripper and shame
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
I think my moral compass just broke
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Randomize
