At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
