you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
And then the night went full on bisexual.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
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