love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize
