so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
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Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
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This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
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