I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
