You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize