If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
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