And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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