I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Dicks are not precious.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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