They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
