I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
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