Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
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So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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