do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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