so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Randomize
