is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize
