We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
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Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
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