ya dads aren't the best wingmen
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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