Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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