I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
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