remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
Did you just see the Batmobile???
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
