you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
your room smells of hookers.
And success
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
where are you?
Hypothermia
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
You called me at 2am singing 'happy birthday' while screaming 'I fucking love you' verses, all while eating a burrito and taking a piss off your apartment balcony
Yeah I know, the people below me already told me
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
