hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
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