apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Randomize
