But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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