yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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