oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
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