The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
Randomize