you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
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