You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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