Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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