I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Randomize
