Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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