sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize