I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
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