i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
Come see our sink grown plant.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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