I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
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