"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize