never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
where are my eyebrows?
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