I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
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