Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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