Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Randomize
