Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
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